What Is Anger?
First of all, anger is normal!
It is the one emotion that we have all shared. While not all of us will know depression, or substance problems, we all know what it is like to be angry, upset or pissed off.
Next, anger exists on a continuum.
You go from Grumpy to Irritable to Frustrated to Angry.
Anger is not always ‘over the top.’
And, anger is about our thinking. We experience…we perceive…we conclude.
A triggering event creates movement toward anger (increasing frustration), then escalation ensues (heating up).
To continue the angry cycle, we keep escalating and reach a decision point: Do I act on my anger, or do I find a different way?
Acting on anger has obvious implications for our relationships, occupations and lives.
Finding a ‘different way’ just might buy us some happiness.
Self-observation skills are central. If we can monitor how we feel, we may be able to manage the shift toward escalation. For some it may not be easy.
If you know something is not right, or others tell you that you are ‘way too angry’ you may need to do something different.
Coaching/Counseling: With a disciplined approach and desire you’ll get good outcomes.
Self Help: If you are a thinker and ‘self-changer’ this will work well. Reading, exercising, yoga, or acupuncture may also work.
Most Efficient: Combine the counseling and the self-help, and that is probably the best solution. Call us at 866-296-5262 if you’d like help getting set up with a therapist.
Start paying attention to how you feel during the day.
When you know you are frustrated, also know that you are vulnerable to getting upset.
Work at ‘settling yourself.’
For more information about Dennis Delfosse, LCPC, click here.
Originally published March 1, 2015